July 26, 2024

How to write a great subject line

Tips on writing a subject line that will get your email opened.

Veronica Fletcher

Co-Founder

Pitching

10 Min Read

TL;DR Put yourself in the position of a reader.

What is the most sharable aspect of your data study (i.e. the most headline-worthy part). Use this as the basis for your subject line and keep it short, clear, and fluff-free.


The subject line is crucial to your email's success, so it's worth taking the time to get it right. If it doesn’t jump out to the journalist as they’re scrolling, they won’t open the email.


I like to think of the subject line as the equivalent of the story's headline - which means it needs to showcase why your pitch is newsworthy.


Here are my top tips.

Emulate current headlines


You can use previous headlines to get an idea of the way journalists like to write about your subject.


Search for data studies or expert commentary articles in the same niche as your study and take note of:

The language and tone they use
How they format the headlines and the way they use statistics


For example, if you’re aiming for tabloid news, you'll often see buzzwords words like 'reveals' and 'hacks'.


But if you’re aiming for top-tier publications, the headlines tend to be more matter-of-fact.

Tip: take a look at our campaign finder (a collection of hundreds of successful PR campaigns) if you need headline inspiration.


But something all headlines have in common is that they're sharable, and would make someone stop and click if they scrolled past it in social media.

Include a number (if possible)


Integrating compelling statistics or numbers into your subject line can dramatically increase its impact.


Here’s a real-life example to illustrate my point:


The first email had the subject line: "Christmas Eve Worst Day Of The Year For Grocery Substitutes"


A 23% open rate isn’t terrible, but I thought we could do better, so for the follow-ups I changed it up: "Grocery Substitutions Surge 349% At Christmas"


Same story, substitutions get worse at Christmas but the second subject line has a shocking number and we got over a 40% open rate.


On the flip side, the statistic must be shocking enough - a weak statistic is likely to have the opposite effect.


Here’s some feedback we got from another pitch we sent out.


Appreciate it's an 11% rise but we need more eye-watering figures to get a news editor's attention.


The journalist liked our story idea (hence why they took the time to give feedback), but said that in the context of the other statistics out there on the same subject, ours wasn’t compelling enough.

Tip: If you have a low % such as 30%, you can make it seem more newsworthy by repositioning it as '1 in 3 people'. This seems a lot higher and is also more relatable for readers. Similarly, something like 45% can be reported as 'almost half'.

Be clear and cut the fluff


Your subject line needs to clearly convey what the story is about with as little fluff and filler words as possible.


Clarity is key for journalists.


Consider whether as a journalist is scanning over their inbox, they're going to immediately understand what your story is about at first glance. To help, try to put the key information at the beginning of your subject line - this also helps to establish relevancy early on.


This is a slightly extreme example, but I wanted to illustrate the point of how filler words can 'bury the lede'. In the bad example, it's not until the very last word that the journalist has any idea what the pitch will be about.


In the good example, the journalist can immediately see the pitch is related to pets, and it's clear there's going to be a ranking of different cities. I have also included (data study) in brackets to make it extra clear to the journo that I am pitching a study that's backed up by data.


If you're pitching expert commentary, definitely include the word expert in the subject line to make this clear.


In the bad example, it's not clear who is providing the tips, or if they have any business giving advice on sleep. There are also lots of necessary filler words at the beginning.


In the good example, straight away the journalist can see the pitch is commentary from a sleep expert, which gives the subject line credibility. I've also included the number of tips to be extra clear.


When a journalist sees a well laid out, clear subject line, it gives them confidence that the pitch will also be good quality.


Never be misleading. Misleading subject lines will waste a journalist's time, and this is just going to annoy them.

Keep it short


I recommend sticking to 55 characters or below. This is a good length for mobile and desktop because the whole subject line can be seen.


If you feel like you need a longer subject line, put all the most important information in the first 55 characters and add the ‘extra’ information at the end.

Tip: You can shorten your subject line by using shortened versions of words like ‘biz’ instead of ‘business’, or “V-Day” instead of “Valentine's Day".

Make it relevant


Along with being attention-grabbing, other elements of a newsworthy subject line include relevance and timeliness.


When I say relevance, there are two types of relevance.

Relevance to the journalist
Relevant to current news topics (i.e. timeliness)

To display relevance to the journalist, you need to let them know the pitch is to do with a topic they cover. I.e if the pitch is to do with pets, you need the word pets in the subject line.

And when you're pitching to a regional news outlet, including the region's name in the subject line is absolutely crucial.

As an example here are some headlines from a study about America's deadliest national parks:


Each of the regional stories is focused on a particular national park or region. If a journalist from Utah received an email with the subject line '10 deadliest national parks', they have no idea if a park in Utah even made the list, so opening it could be a total waste of their time.


Timeliness comes in if your pitch is related to a currently trending news story, an event, or a special occasion. The link needs to be made clear in the subject line.


e.g.


"Dry Jan: Vermont ranks 2nd for interest in dry Jan"

Tip: If you have a few journalists you are convinced will want to cover your story, consider going the extra mile and creating a subject line tailored just for them.

How to come up with your subject line


The subject line is always the last thing I write.


You need to have a clear idea in your mind of what the best angle for the story is (more tips on this in our in-depth guide to writing a pitch), and you'll be in the best position for this once you've finalised your pitch.


The first subject line you come up with isn't going to be the best one you can find.


Start by jotting down 5-10 ideas, then refine these until you're satisfied. AI tools can help with brainstorming and editing, helping you to condense and sharpen your subject lines.


Tip: If you’re struggling to decide out of a few subject lines, ask an outsider which one they would be most likely to open.

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