Allison Raskin

Host at Just Between Us

Writer at Emotional Support Lady

Writer, podcaster, mental heath advocate and relationship coach. My new romcom novel SAVE THE DATE is out now!

Articles

AM I ABOUT TO LOSE MY ENTIRE SENSE OF SELF?

4 days ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

Everything is going to change, new parents tell you ominously. The life you knew before, where you prioritized your own well-being, will soon be a thing of the past. Sleep is off the table as is any sense of bodily autonomy for those of us who plan to breastfeed. You will have to adapt to a different version of yourself in order to survive. Fine, I think. I am not that attached to this version of me anyway. In fact, lately, I haven’t been attached to anything at all. This post is for paid subscribers
WHAT IF WE NEVER GET THE LIFE WE WANT?

1 week ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

Back in January, my husband and I had a difficult conversation. We were sitting in my dad’s house in New York, on the same couch where my mother had lost control of her body just a few months before. Perhaps it was this recent loss of my mom that emboldened me to be so direct. John and I were discussing the potential end of our relationship, not skirting around it but looking the possibility right in the face, and yet I felt eerily calm. My life had already turned upside down once.
I’M IN MY AVOIDANCE ERA

3 weeks ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

“What are you doing for Mother’s Day?”I shouldn’t have been surprised so many people asked me this, with a hint of concern. It was a double whammy of a holiday for me this year. The first May without my mom and the first time I’ve ever been a mom-to-be. I imagine most of my friends thought I’d be an emotional wreck, spending the day sobbing and/or honoring my mother’s unparalleled impact on my life. I did neither.
IS IT TOO SOON TO TELL YOU I’M PREGNANT?

1 month ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

I had my first positive pregnancy test on April 6. The line was so faint, I had a hard time believing it was true. My husband, an innate optimist, immediately started celebrating while I tried to temper my expectations. After all, there are few things less guaranteed than a full-term pregnancy in your mid-30’s. Especially when you’ve recently had a string of life-changing bad things happen to you and are on defense for the next shoe to drop.
THINGS I CAN’T DO ANYMORE

1 month ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

1) I can’t call you out of the blue to ask if something really happened to me or not. You were the holder of family memories while my mind is often blank or obscured with doubt. I’ll never be able to fact-check my personal lore again, which means I will likely lose much of it to time like I have the actual memories. 2) I can’t go on all day shopping trips with you where we scamper from dressing room to dressing room hoping to find new versions of ourselves.
HOW OFTEN SHOULD I TALK ABOUT MY DEAD MOM?

1 month ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

I guested on a podcast the other week and after a wonderful mix of banter and heartfelt advice, I did what many would consider a serious faux pas. I made a shocking and destructive comment about my mother being dead. Even as it was happening, I had a sense I probably shouldn’t do this. It’s one thing to make that kind of joke when I am on my own podcast because my Just Between Us co-hosts already know 1) my mom is dead and 2) I have an affinity for dark jokes.
THE MESSY WORK OF TURNING YOUR REAL LIFE INTO FICTION

1 month ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

When I asked my audiobook director, who is also one of my closest friends, who her favorite character was in my new romcom novel, SAVE THE DATE, she laughed and said it wouldn’t be fair to answer since so many of the characters are based on real people she knows. It felt too rude to say, for instance, that she liked Jackie over Alan because that would imply she liked my sister, Jocelyn, more than my father, Ken. Except…it wouldn’t actually be rude because Jackie and Alan aren’t real.
NOT MAKING MY MOTHER’S MISTAKES

2 months ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

For my 35th birthday last June, I decided I wanted to paint some ceramics. So I dragged my parents and husband to Color Me Mine in the middle of the week. The location we went to was on the brink of shutting down and we were the only customers. As we debated what to paint, my mother declared she wasn’t going to partake in what is (strangely) my favorite activity. She said she wasn’t any good at it, so it was better not to try.
SAVE THE DATE | Kirkus Reviews

2 months ago | kirkusreviews.com | Allison Raskin |Kristin Hannah

A frothy romp that doesn’t take itself too seriously, despite the endearing earnestness of its main character. A 30-something Jewish woman decides to find a new groom when she’s unceremoniously dumped six months before her wedding.
I'M TERRIFIED TO SHARE THIS WITH YOU

2 months ago | emotionalsupportlady.substack.com | Allison Raskin

For years I used to tell people, “The one great thing about books is that if you sell one, you know it will one day exist in the world.” While this might seem obvious, it couldn’t be further from how the entertainment industry works. I’ve sold four TV shows to different networks over the years and they have all died in various stages of development. It is never a sure thing that your show will get made and distributed until it’s actually on the air. And even then it could get canceled mid season.