Elinor Jones
Columnist, The Trash Report at Portland Mercury
Portland friend and writer. Haters to the airlock. she/her
Articles
-
1 week ago |
portlandmercury.com | Elinor Jones
Hello, and welcome to another Trash Report! I am Elinor Jones. Wow, I just saw that this Nikon photography account on Instagram got a pic of all of us in a tree together (I'm the one whispering): Imagine that's still us and I am reading you all of the following: Dumpster Nation President Trump had denied that any of his favorite boys would be punished for the demon group chat from hell, but apparently National Security Advisor Mike Waltz has ended up with his head on the chopping block.
-
2 weeks ago |
portlandmercury.com | Elinor Jones
Hello, beautifuls! It's me, Elinor Jones, back with another Trash Report for your eyes and your hearts. Did you know that the latest PRINT ISSUE of the Mercury is out now, which is a GUIDE TO FUN?! There's a bonus Trash Report in there. And then Mercury editor-in-chief Wm. Steven Humphrey asked if I had anything else to contribute and I was like, "best I can do is a list of places to disassociate." It's not so much "fun" as it is "not agony"—but hey, we write what we know.
-
2 weeks ago |
portlandmercury.com | Elinor Jones
Sometimes when life gives you lemons, you can make lemonade. Other times, you just look at the lemons and deeply seethe at your misfortune. Like, lemons? Again with the fucking lemons? WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE ALL THESE LEMONS?! But there is a place between misery and elation, where you can step away from stress without feeling the need to grin and put on a show.
-
3 weeks ago |
portlandmercury.com | Elinor Jones
Hello friends, and welcome to The Trash Report! This is a space for talking about what’s happening in the world. The Mercury is publishing a "Portland Guide to FUN" issue this coming week, and I have been asked to play along, even though much of the news right now is very—how you say—not fun.
-
1 month ago |
portlandmercury.com | Elinor Jones
Hi everybody! I'm Elinor Jones. Welcome back to the Trash Report. I almost feel bad giving you a reason to look at screen-based content when it is SO GODDAMN BEAUTIFUL OUTSIDE. I could never live in one of those year-round summer hellholes; we need the darkness to appreciate all this light. Do I mind that the stunning greenery causes my eyes to water profusely and I sneeze so many times in a row that I get regular nosebleeds? I'll be honest: I don't love it! But it's worth it.
Try JournoFinder For Free
Search and contact over 1M+ journalist profiles, browse 100M+ articles, and unlock powerful PR tools.
Start Your 7-Day Free Trial →X (formerly Twitter)
- Followers
- 507
- Tweets
- 6K
- DMs Open
- Yes