Harris O'Malley

1 week ago | goodmenproject.com | Harris O'Malley

Dear Dr. NerdLove,I feel like I’m stranded on a desert island when it comes to finding a meaningful relationship. I’m starting to wonder if I’m holding myself back with self-limiting beliefs, but I’m not sure how to break free. I’d really appreciate your insight—I’m at a loss and could use some direction. I’m 32, though I’m often told I look younger, and I’d say I’m generally considered attractive. I’ve never been married, don’t have kids, and have no addictions.

1 week ago | uexpress.com | Harris O'Malley

DEAR DR. NERDLOVE: In general, I noticed a pattern with men I have dated. They all had better relationships with other people and I realize I was objectified maybe or used maybe because they did not include me but included those other people? Let’s say that had plans with them and not me. I was left “in the dark”. Especially with my ex-husband.��Now that I have realized this unfortunately in my 40’s I have been more discerning and less accepting of certain behaviors.

1 week ago | uexpress.com | Harris O'Malley

DEAR DR. NERDLOVE: So there is really no easier way to say this: I royally f--ked up, I f--ked up my friendships, I f--ked up my chances at dating, I f--ked up my chances of finding any community of like-minded individuals and I f--ked up all chances for possibly anyone too trust me ever again. All because my impulsiveness, insecurity, self-hatred, assumptions, letting stereotypes override reality and honestly, now with hindsight, willful ignorance also overriding said reality.

1 week ago | goodmenproject.com | Harris O'Malley

Hi Dr. NerdLove,First, the exposition. The backdrop is not extraordinary these days; I’m facing down a really rough job market and the stress of big transitions in my life that really serves to complicate my perception of how much stress I SHOULD be feeling, all the while trying to work to turn my mental health around. I’ve made a lot of big steps forward, building up my social and professional network, but I still feel very stuck romantically, for reasons I deeply struggle to articulate.

1 week ago | uexpress.com | Harris O'Malley

DEAR DR. NERDLOVE: So there is really no easier way to say this: I royally f--ked up, I f--ked up my friendships, I f--ked up my chances at dating, I f--ked up my chances of finding any community of like-minded individuals and I f--ked up all chances for possibly anyone too trust me ever again. All because my impulsiveness, insecurity, self-hatred, assumptions, letting stereotypes override reality and honestly, now with hindsight, willful ignorance also overriding said reality.