Jacqueline Dooley

2 weeks ago | medium.com | Jacqueline Dooley

Member-only storyCome walk with me and look at mushrooms in the forestJacqueline Dooley·FollowPublished inGrief Book Club·7 min read·--A mushroom (possibly some type of amanita) — All photos by authorIt’s April and that means that mushroom season is almost upon us. I love taking walks along the wooded trails near my home in New York’s Mid-Hudson Valley. There’s something soul-nourishing about forest bathing, the practice of immersing yourself in the forest and slowing down.

4 weeks ago | memoirland.substack.com | Jacqueline Dooley

My daughter Ana was an incredibly gifted singer and musician. Ana was diagnosed with cancer in 2012 when she was 11. Just under five years later, in March 2017, Ana died from her disease. Ana left a legacy of music that, eight years after her death, is fading. It seems like only those of us who were closest to Ana — me, my husband, and my younger daughter — remember Ana’s voice. This is what I want to talk about in March, the month that Ana’s life ended. Right from the start, music lit Ana up.

1 month ago | medium.com | Jacqueline Dooley

Eight years ago today, it was mineJacqueline Dooley·FollowPublished inGrief Book Club·4 min read·--Ana snuggling Roo on March 21, 2017. Photo by author. On any given day I often think, someone’s child died on this day one or five or twenty years ago. And today is my day. Eight years ago on March 22nd, it was my child who died. All those years ago, I knew Ana was fading, that the time for saying goodbye was rapidly arriving. But each morning, I hoped for one more good day. And one more. And one more.

1 month ago | medium.com | Jacqueline Dooley

I want to share something about Ana that only a few of us rememberJacqueline Dooley·FollowPublished inGrief Book Club·2 min read·--Ana, age 14. All photos owned by author. When my daughter Ana was 11, she was diagnosed with a rare cancer called inflammatory myofibroblastic tumor (IMT). Five years later, on March 22, 2017, Ana died from her disease.

1 month ago | medium.com | Jacqueline Dooley

Year eight without my daughter begins with me learning a new skillJacqueline Dooley·FollowPublished inGrief Book Club·8 min read·--Watercolor Meadow — Painting by AuthorYear 1The first year is hard to recall with clarity except for the moment she died. She is in her own bed. I sit beside her and wish, with my whole heart, that I can die in her place. Is that such a strange thing to wish for? I am her mother, after all. I walk around with an ache that squeezes my chest and takes my strength away.