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3 weeks ago | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert |Sara Pastoor |Christopher Habig |Eva Feder Kittay
After I was medically discharged from the military for seeking mental health treatment and transitioned out of surgery residency to recover, I isolated in guilt, shame, and exhaustion. Despite my surgery program director telling me repeatedly that he was not disappointed in me and supporting me fully in my decision to transition into a different specialty where I could better take care of my health, I felt worthless and like a complete failure.
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Jan 14, 2025 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert |Casey Paul Schukow |Michele Luckenbaugh |Naomi Tweyo Nkinsi
I used to pride myself on being a perfectionist and high achiever, and I held onto those identities tightly. Today, my diplomas are stored in a box at the bottom of a closet. I recycled the majority of my race medals, and reviewing my CV contributes to pain.
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Dec 21, 2024 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert
Society is obsessed with weight loss. Part of my brain is, too, albeit I am well aware that there will be no number low enough on the scale to satisfy that part of me. Anorexia nervosa is a poorly understood and mismanaged condition from my perspective as a health care professional and patient with lived experience.
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Dec 13, 2024 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert
The people unwilling to tolerate the BS in the face of dysfunction are often identified as the problem by those who have adapted to and/or benefit from maintaining the status quo. Too often, we believe it—that we are the problem. By challenging this belief and reframing it, we can reclaim our narrative and empower ourselves to stay true to our mission. We can keep being “the problem” in ways that align with our capacity to make the changes we wish to see in the world.
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Dec 4, 2024 | 
medium.com | Jillian Rigert
Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, ACC·Follow6 min read·--Shortly after finishing my last medical school rotation during oral surgery residency, I surrendered to the recommendation from my outpatient eating disorder team to admit myself into the inpatient eating disorder unit… after months of resistance.
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Nov 30, 2024 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert |Michele Luckenbaugh |Emily Watters |Kellie Stecher
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned on my hero’s journey is the importance of learning to accept ourselves (our full selves). I couldn’t sit across from patients, clients, friends, or family members the way I wanted to until I started to love all parts of me. When I am grounded in love for all parts of me, I show up differently. I show up better able to love all parts of you, too, and am better able to be present with curiosity, compassion, and without judgment.
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Nov 29, 2024 | 
medium.com | Jillian Rigert
Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, ACC·Follow5 min read·--Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, ACCOriginally published on KevinMD.com April 24, 2024In 2016, I sat on a hospital bed in Utah, having flown from North Carolina for specialized medical treatment as my life was slowly slipping away from starvation. During this time, I was in the Air Force and an oral and maxillofacial surgery resident completing the medical school portion of my training which I loved. On paper, I had made it.
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Nov 28, 2024 | 
medium.com | Jillian Rigert
Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, ACC·Follow3 min read·--Jillian Rigert, DMD, MD, ACCTLDR — The people who are unwilling to tolerate the BS in the face of dysfunction are often identified as the problem by those who have adapted and/or benefit from the maintenance of the status quo.
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Sep 21, 2024 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert |Dawn Baker |Yoo Jung Kim |Sarah Murad
You can’t tell how much someone is suffering by looking at them—one reason I don’t share my journey with anorexia using photos to signify my mental health status. I’ve suffered more when appearing well, and “before and after photos” would spread misconceptions about eating disorders. They don’t magically go away with weight restoration and nourishment. People assume I no longer live with anorexia.
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Sep 4, 2024 | 
kevinmd.com | Jillian Rigert |Natalie LaBossier |Jay Wong |Aaron Morgenstein
In 2019, I bought a condo, as growing up with the image of the American Dream told me to buy a house as soon as I could. I loved my little condo, but I felt trapped. I decorated the rooms and made it a home, but it wasn’t me. In 2020, I sold it and nearly everything in it, minimizing my belongings. This was not the most economical decision when it came to house selling, but I felt free. At the time, I knew I would not be staying in my job, but I had no idea what was next.
