Lewis Oakley

1 week ago | bi.org | Lewis Oakley

Dear Lewis I recently came across a story about a woman in a relationship with a bisexual man. He wanted to stay romantically involved with another man while being in a relationship with her. It hit close to home. I’m a 43-year-old bi man, married to a 43-year-old straight woman. We've been together for 25 years, married for 21, and have two kids. Over time, what I think of as my “bi-cycle” — the pull toward same-gender connection — has only gotten stronger.

1 month ago | bi.org | Lewis Oakley

Hi Lewis, I am a 29-year-old bi man. I was in a beautiful three-year relationship with my girlfriend, whom I love very much, and we have a great emotional and physical connection. I had been attracted to men before, but I was always in denial of my sexuality. During my relationship, the curiosity was still there, and I went onto the apps to explore my sexuality and talk to men. Though I never met anyone, I knew it was still cheating.

1 month ago | bi.org | Lewis Oakley

Dear Lewis, I recently started dating a wonderful man — charming, intelligent, and kind. After a few dates, he told me he’s bi and, in his previous marriage, had secretly explored this side of himself. He regrets not being honest, but now that he’s single, he says he needs both male and female connections to feel truly fulfilled. He’s asked me to accept this part of him, insisting it’s not about love but about a biological drive and mental well-being.

2 months ago | bi.org | Lewis Oakley

Hi Lewis, I'll keep this one short and sweet. I've been wondering if it's worth coming out to my family. I see how they react whenever they see anything LGBT-related on TV, and it makes me question whether it’s even worth the effort. If I decide to stay quiet, though, am I being true to myself, or is that just another way of lying to who I am? Kiera Hi Kiera, Thanks so much for reaching out.

Jan 9, 2025 | bi.org | Lewis Oakley

Hi Lewis, As a bi guy, I often feel invisible even within the LGBT community. What can I do to find my place? Hi James, Thanks for reaching out and I completely understand how tough this can be. Sadly, feeling invisible or excluded is a common experience for bi people, even in spaces that are meant to be inclusive. But there are some ways I’d recommend to begin to carve out your place: Wear it! Visibility starts with being seen.