Madeline Grant

England, London

Parliamentary Sketchwriter and Columnist at The Telegraph

Special envoy to the Nations and Regions

Articles

They will say this was ‘parliament at its best’. And they will be lying

1 week ago | spectator.co.uk | Madeline Grant

The portents this morning were grim. The Grim Leadreaper was doing her HR manager of Hades act, buzzing around with faux sincerity like a wasp that had discovered LGBT History Month. Jess Philips took a great huff on her vape in the lobby before walking into the chamber. Perhaps it was sulphur flavour.
Rayner’s PMQs performance will trouble Starmer

1 week ago | spectator.com.au | Madeline Grant

As you might have noticed from the crowds weeping in the streets and the appearance of sackcloth, ashes and rent, er, garments: Sir Keir Starmer wasn’t at Prime Minister’s Questions this afternoon. Instead we got Big Ange – who absolutely, definitely, doesn’t want the job for herself. She’d come dressed in a fetching double-breasted blazer and cream trouser combo which made her look like a judge at Henley or an old-school pub landlord.
Rayner's PMQs performance will trouble Starmer

1 week ago | spectator.co.uk | Madeline Grant

As you might have noticed from the crowds weeping in the streets and the appearance of sackcloth, ashes and rent, er, garments: Sir Keir Starmer wasn’t at Prime Minister’s Questions this afternoon. Instead we got Big Ange – who absolutely, definitely, doesn’t want the job for herself. She’d come dressed in a fetching double-breasted blazer and cream trouser combo which made her look like a judge at Henley or an old-school pub landlord. Or even, perhaps deliberately, Nigel Farage.
Starmer looked out of place in the mountains with Sky’s Beth Rigby

1 week ago | spectator.com.au | Madeline Grant

Sir Keir Starmer was doing an interview with Beth Rigby in the lush mountain landscape of Canada. Hardly a man who evokes the sweeping grandeur of nature, seeing the Prime Minister surrounded by mountains and pines was odd. It looked a little like someone had mistakenly cast a chartered accountant in the Sound of Music.
Starmer looked out of place in the mountains with Sky's Beth Rigby

1 week ago | spectator.co.uk | Madeline Grant

Sir Keir Starmer was doing an interview with Beth Rigby in the lush mountain landscape of Canada. Hardly a man who evokes the sweeping grandeur of nature, seeing the Prime Minister surrounded by mountains and pines was odd. It looked a little like someone had mistakenly cast a chartered accountant in the Sound of Music. What percentage is his approval rating? Seventeen going on sixteen of course.
Kemi was at her best skewering Labour on grooming gangs

1 week ago | spectator.com.au | Madeline Grant

Yvette Cooper had come to the House of Commons to shut, as loudly and with as much gusto as she could manage, a stable door long after the horse had bolted. The government was finally doing what it had long derided as ‘a far-right bandwagon’ and agreed to a national inquiry into the Pakistani rape gangs which blighted small-town England for decades.
Kemi was at her best skewering Labour on grooming gangs

1 week ago | spectator.co.uk | Madeline Grant

Yvette Cooper had come to the House of Commons to shut, as loudly and with as much gusto as she could manage, a stable door long after the horse had bolted. The government was finally doing what it had long derided as ‘a far-right bandwagon’ and agreed to a national inquiry into the Pakistani rape gangs which blighted small-town England for decades.
The spending review was 45 minutes I will never get back

2 weeks ago | spectator.com.au | Madeline Grant

Rachel Reeves looked a little surprised at the cheers from the Labour benches that greeted her as she stood to give the Commons details of the spending review. As well she might: there can’t be many places where her presence is met with such enthusiasm; the National Reserve of Mauritius perhaps? Or Reform HQ?
The spending review was 45 minutes I will never get back

2 weeks ago | spectator.co.uk | Madeline Grant

Rachel Reeves looked a little surprised at the cheers from the Labour benches that greeted her as she stood to give the Commons details of the spending review. As well she might: there can’t be many places where her presence is met with such enthusiasm; the National Reserve of Mauritius perhaps? Or Reform HQ? I’m sure her continued presence in No. 11 raises some smiles there.
Ed Miliband is an astonishing Commons performer

2 weeks ago | spectator.com.au | Madeline Grant

I’m not totally sure where they keep Ed Miliband in between his Commons appearances. Perhaps some sort of deep freeze for the terminally media-unsavvy, in between Lammy and Lucy Powell. True, he is allowed to do the odd cringe-inducing publicity video, like the time he filmed his atonal strumming of a ukulele in front of a wind turbine.