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2 weeks ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
In this economy, we could all use the extra dough since we blew ours on scratch cards and Big Gulps. The art of the side hustle takes on many forms but we've narrowed it down to three ways to forge your own path while rolling in the cash. 1) Ordained MinisterWhen we were 17, we became a "Doctor of Divinity" through the Universal Life Church by paying them $50 via money order.
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2 weeks ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
Are you like us? Do you have such crippling ADHD that you feel bored all the time unless you can get a massive dopamine surge from activities that make you feel like you may possibly die? Then, once you work up the bravery to do the death-defying activity that gives you so much anxiety, you feel good about it for all of two hours before you feel empty again and search for the next adrenaline dump? Well, here's what you should do this summer.
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2 weeks ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
Colorado State Patrol (CSP) lost 600 pounds of marijuana last month after it was stolen from an evidence lockup in Arapahoe County, and honestly, we're pretty giddy about it. CSP thinks the heist occurred around the beginning of April, but they didn't notice that someone had taken more than a quarter ton of marijuana until at least a week later.
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1 month ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
Two men from Colorado stand accused of attempting to use a cannon to launch contraband into a prison in Louisiana, and based on our long and intensive upbringing that mainly consisted of Wile E. Coyote cartoons, we don't see why that isn't completely feasible.
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2 months ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
1) Your Loved Ones Know Your Drunken TellsOur girlfriend once told us "I know you're absolutely loaded when you want to put concerts on the TV. You pick Skynyrd or Creed and then stare at the ceiling for the entirety of the video," and to be fair, she's completely 100 percent correct. Do you know how often our girlfriend had to witness that for it to become a known pattern?
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2 months ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
The Colorado Supreme Court has ruled that, because elephants aren't people, they don't have the ability to pursue their own release from a Colorado Springs zoo, and while this creates a very intense and hard to follow ethical and legal argument, we can't help but ask the question: What if elephants WERE people?
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2 months ago | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
which means the time to stave off our incoming existential crises by driving away from our home with some poorly organized camping gear haphazardly thrown into our trunk in a panicked search for meaning is upon us. Here's our list of road trip spots and as long as you imagine doing all of these activities in a Subaru while wearing a Melanzana jacket, you'll be fine.
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Feb 3, 2025 | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
Elk Rescued After Becoming Tangledin Climbing Rope. An elk was rescued outside of Lake City at a popular ice climbing spot after it became tangled in a climbing rope. According to CBS News, the elk was tranquilized before being blindfolded so that the rope could then be removed from the animal's antlers. We don't think this is a big deal, personally.
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Sep 4, 2024 | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
Some thieves keep breaking into the Columbine Steak House & Lounge to only steal steaks in one of the funniest heists we've seen all year. The owner told USA TODAY that this is the third time it's happened, and that even though the thieves have access to the bar and an ATM machine, they choose to only steal steaks.
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Jan 31, 2024 | 
therooster.com | Marshall Dunham
We've got a few predictions on how we'll be allotting our screen time for the rest of the year. Here's our top five ways that we expect to spend 2024 on our phones. Weigh the Various Pros and Cons of Meditation Apps Before Downloading One and Never Touching It AgainWe do this about twice a year. We'll peruse the app store for the one app that's really going to help us get our shit together, we'll read countless reviews and think heavily on all of our options before finally settling on an app.
