Scarlet Meyer

1 month ago | pointsincase.com | Aaron Chown |Michael Lukk Litwak |Scarlet Meyer |Just Lunning

FridayI emerged from my ship onto the arid festival grounds of Indio, California. Those who dared transport me will soon die, drowning in their own blood at the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs. My shadow grows long on the playa, striking fear into the hearts of those who dare utter “Missy Elliot is kinda mid.”Famished after such a journey, I tried a plant based Hot Honey Chick’n Sandwich sold out of a retrofitted vintage RV.

Jan 22, 2025 | thebelladonnacomedy.com | Scarlet Meyer |Sara Nicole |Meg Reid

My reply is, that sounds like a “you” problem. By: Scarlet Meyer, Sara Nicole, and Meg ReidWait, can a children’s toy really help me select my health insurance plan? — It is certain that a Mattel Magic 8 Ball™ is as accurate as you are at predicting your medical future. How much will I actually spend on each plan’s premiums, co-pays, co-insurances, deductibles, and other out-of-pockets? — Cannot predict now, just guestimate using a Mattel Vintage Abacus™.

Dec 18, 2024 | mcsweeneys.net | Scarlet Meyer

Yoga for Young Adults Who Did Something Weird to Their Backs Fifteen-Minute Yoga for the Modern Woman Who Spent the First Ten Minutes of Her Free Time Having a Panic Attack (Actually Only Five Minutes of Yoga) The Exact Amount of Yoga You Need to Do to Tick That Box Where You Can Confidently Tell Your Doctor and Your Therapist That You’re “Doing Yoga” Yoga for Reading Any Email That Begins with “People Are Trying to Reach You on LinkedIn” Breathing Exercises for Checking LinkedIn and Seeing...

May 29, 2024 | mcsweeneys.net | Scarlet Meyer

“We must journey forth,” commanded the good Wizard Byroncorn to Luanne Wyldsmith, the graceful ager and chosen one, user of hyaluronic face potions and seeker of bargain discounts. “Why do you dally so?”“If we wait until tomorrow’s pay period,” replied Luanne Wyldsmith, “I can use my membership card points to book our next stay at the inn.”“My lady, the dragon warlocks grow nearer as we speak.

Jan 10, 2024 | pointsincase.com | Scarlet Meyer

Hey, you there. Your mama’s so big and I’ve got a thing for tall, voluptuous women. Can I have her number? Your mama’s so old, her laugh lines got laugh lines. Which is the sign of a life well lived. Whenever she chuckles I feel my heart catch in my chest and I can’t help but giggle with her. Your mom’s like an Uber, anyone can ride if they’ve got a working credit card. I’m sorry that was a low blow. I've just got a big crush and talking about her makes me nervous.