Scott Kerman

2 weeks ago | eagletribune.com | Scott Kerman

A report came out recently that the chances of an asteroid striking Earth has more than doubled in a matter of weeks, according to NASA astronomers. After watching the nightly news, this report gives me something to look forward to. The asteroid discovered just after Christmas and named 2024 YR4 could strike in December of 2032. When the detection of the asteroid was announced in December, NASA predicted just a 1.3% probability of it hitting Earth. The likelihood has increased to 3.1%.

1 month ago | eagletribune.com | Scott Kerman

Could I please have a moment of silence? I’m here to report that sadly, during the bitterly cold stretch of a few weeks ago, our furnace died. Dead like George Washington, if he had been designed to specifically provide heat to our living space. The New England tradition is that when a heating guy says your furnace needs replacing, you need to come up with a plan to see how many more decades you can make it last. kAm“w@?6J[ x 7:8FC65 :E @FE] (6 42?

2 months ago | eagletribune.com | Scott Kerman

I currently have a nemesis, the definition being a rival who just somehow seems able to get the best of you. At times, I’ve had one in school, sports, comedy and the business world. But this one is unique. It’s a freaking chipmunk. I call him Bill. Actually I call him something else involving profanity. Bill lives beneath my backyard shed. Bill does not pay rent, but he does live rent free in my head. He secretly moved in three years ago in the dead of winter, when my Ring cameras and I weren’t looking.

2 months ago | eagletribune.com | Scott Kerman

Marriage is a series of negotiations. On this particular day, I negotiated with my wife that I would clean out the garage in exchange for her to make pumpkin cake. The bargaining was Cuban Missile Crisis intense. Lots of banging on the table and storming out. Only to return and back and forth and back. Not a completely fair deal. Truth be known, no husband ever wins any of these discussions, as she would not help in the garage, but help herself to a piece of cake.

Jan 23, 2025 | eagletribune.com | Scott Kerman

Last week, my wife asked me if I had eaten the last cinnamon roll. I told her that as a man of great honor, I was offended to the highest degree by her accusation. I refused to participate in any part of her investigation, as being considered a primary suspect was an atrocity. She replied, “I know you did. All I have to do is look at your lying, frosted face.”kAms2>?:E[ >J 8@@5 ?2>6 H@F=5 92G6 C6>2:?65 :?E24E :7 H6 ;FDE 925?’E CF?