Zachary Zane

2 months ago | cosmopolitan.com | Zachary Zane

Nearly a decade ago, when I started practicing polyamory, I remember feeling like a castaway at sea—completely lost. I wanted to be this “perfect” poly person who never got jealous, clearly communicated their desires and boundaries without fear, and had boundless energy and desire for multiple partners a week. It took me a while to realize that this “perfect” poly person doesn’t exist, and that the criteria I’d developed for being perfect was, in many ways, lacking.

2 months ago | menshealth.com | Zachary Zane

WHEN IT COMES to long-term relationships, we often hear that sexual desire can have its ebbs and flows. There are moments of fiery passion and connection, followed by stretches where the idea of having sex feels distant, even laughable. While this is totally normal, what happens if you find yourself yearning for more sex—but your mind and body seem at odds? How do you reconnect with your erotic self and start to feel desire again? And how do you rebuild trust with a partner after facing betrayal?

2 months ago | menshealth.com | Zachary Zane

I'm Zachary Zane, a sex columnist and author of Boyslut: A Memoir and Manifesto. Over the years, I've had my fair share of sexual experiences, dating and sleeping with hundreds of people of all genders and orientations. In doing so, I've learned a thing or two about navigating issues in the bedroom (and many other places, TBH). I'm here to answer your most pressing sex questions with thorough, actionable advice that isn't just "communicate with your partner" because you know that already.

2 months ago | menshealth.com | Zachary Zane

I'm Zachary Zane, a sex columnist and author of Boyslut: A Memoir and Manifesto. Over the years, I've had my fair share of sexual experiences, dating and sleeping with hundreds of people of all genders and orientations. In doing so, I've learned a thing or two about navigating issues in the bedroom (and many other places, TBH). I'm here to answer your most pressing sex questions with thorough, actionable advice that isn't just "communicate with your partner" because you know that already.

2 months ago | menshealth.com | Zachary Zane

According to recent research published in Harvard Health, during sexual intercourse, men burn an average of five calories per minute – about the same as holding a plank for one minute. Not a huge amount, it must be said. As for a man’s heart rate, it rarely exceeds 130 beats per minute, and you'll consume the same amount of oxygen as when playing ping pong. It really does seem that men perhaps spend more energy thinking about sex than actually having it.