Nedra Nuggets

3 days ago | nedratawwab.substack.com | Nedra Tawwab

My acts of discipline started as New Year's resolutions. This is no way an encouragement to live by the code of creating annual resolutions—after all, we're already a few months into the year. However, as a teenager, resolutions were the only path I knew to self-discipline in a way others wouldn't question. I was not yet brave, and I needed people not to ask too many questions. If you said a change was due to a resolution, people understood. One year, I gave up candy.

1 week ago | nedratawwab.substack.com | Nedra Tawwab

Many things can trigger resentment in us, and some of them are hard to acknowledge. I’ve heard people say they resent:Their childrenTheir partner’s ability to avoid guilt when they have the freedom to do certain thingsTheir coworker who has a familyTheir coworker who’s childlessPeople who can dance well without ever taking a classWe often have to live with resentment in our relationships. We have to sit with it, unable to simply step away.

2 weeks ago | nedratawwab.substack.com | Nedra Tawwab

I used to be a Groupon girl. Specifically, I used Groupon to get deals on massages, which meant I was always going to a new person. At some point, I realized I needed some consistency because, guess what? Going to all these different people meant I was having a different experience every time. My ideal massage is basically a “rubbed nap.” I want to feel like I’m lying on someone’s chest while they gently rub my back. I don’t want anything too deep or intense—just enough to lull me to sleep.

3 weeks ago | nedratawwab.substack.com | Nedra Tawwab

In 2019, at a retreat I was at, someone asked a mom if she missed her kids. She gave the most marvelous response: "I don't miss them."How freeing is that? Another mother listening to her was shocked—she couldn’t believe she had said that. It made me think about the guilt we associate with not missing people. When we’re always with someone—whether it’s our partner, friends, or kids—how can we miss them? Missing someone requires separation. Time apart, solitude—it’s essential.

1 month ago | nedratawwab.substack.com | Nedra Tawwab

Sometimes, we may face severe relationship issues with someone. They might have untreated mental health challenges that result in anger outbursts or rude and disrespectful behaviors. They could struggle with substance abuse, and in extreme cases, they might be outright abusive. These issues may lead us to step away from the relationship. However, there are times when that person returns, ready to re-engage. When that happens, we might feel a strong desire to reconnect.