Garrison Keillor

We’re living in Mencken’s world now. He said, “Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars." https://t.co/IIqj35561C

The show is a service to the crowd; it’s not for me to show off. I give them a singing intermission, they stand and sing “America” and “I Saw Her Standing There,” which gives older men the pleasure of singing falsetto OOOOHs. https://t.co/m9qGUXj88L

I have two nephews who are very good to their mother and I stand in awe of them and think, “There goes the man I meant to be.” https://t.co/cdCFNvEOvE

Life is good, even when we’re alienated. We Democrats got skunked and so for the next four years, we’re free to savor life itself. https://t.co/RwWT4QraHL

When people open up a conversation and ask about my line of work, I don’t say I’m an author because they’ll say, “I’ve been thinking about writing a book myself.” https://t.co/QYd1UZdBs9

Praise drifts around like spritzes of aromatic cologne but what matters is the love of rewriting and re-rewriting and revision of the re-rewrite, and then the revision of that, and so on. https://t.co/UBOODAm86e

As I proceed through my eighties, I go back to a Minnesota point of view: life is complicated, take it one day at a time, the urge to be top dog is not a useful ambition, be grateful for what you have. https://t.co/lP6JkzWL2w

On Election Day, I expected Wonder Woman to win who fights for justice, peace, and equality, and she did not. It goes against what Miss Mortenson taught us in tenth-grade civics class so I went to Texas to try to make sense of it. https://t.co/Qd4YOnqDkt

Enough with the catcalls and the spitballs, let’s try bowing our heads and all singing in the same key. https://t.co/6RPgni4cjC

it seems right, at the end of my career, to get back to basics and do two sets on a stage next to the men’s room on a profoundly cold night in St. Paul. https://t.co/KwkA744n5h

New York cops ride around in squad cars and during rush hour a squad car has zero chance of catching a speeding outlaw bicyclist racing through the three-foot gap between parked cars and cars stuck in traffic. https://t.co/URkrzyFB8f

The Times photo desk, bless their hearts, is enjoying the game of choosing unflattering photographs of the Cabinet nominees. The Treasury Secretary seems to be saying, “That’s not my linguini. I ordered the one with clam sauce.” https://t.co/q27h9yyYUy

I have successfully avoided literary awards so I am not oppressed by my own eminence. Every morning I feel like a beginner. https://t.co/5lEhz3TRr9

It’s heartwarming to see a 78-year-old person head-over-heels for a guy devoted to cars and rockets, and now that La Donna is elected, he can cut the macho act and bring out the pantsuits and high heels and just be himself. https://t.co/9fHIkeM3sQ

The beauty of being on the losing side is that there is no shame. Kamala Harris was a serious and tireless candidate who ran a heroic campaign and spoke about the real world. https://t.co/9ZI2vuW6ke

I am looking forward to November 6 when at last we may be done with the “How in the world is this actually happening in America today” conversation and we will return to enjoying our lives. https://t.co/a2nRJMQEWi

I grew up in Minnesota where there are more Scandinavians than anyone needs, people whose idea of delight is “not that bad.” https://t.co/FAYAejLWyY