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4 days ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My young teen grandson has a steady girlfriend who is bright, beautiful and caring, and who makes my grandson happy. They went to a school dance, and my daughter bought my grandson a special outfit for it. His girlfriend was lovely, but was wearing something that was clearly less than new. Of course, they had a wonderful evening.
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1 week ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a friend, Nora, whom I have known since high school. She now lives in a nearby town, but too far to just make a visit for the day, so when we do get together, it requires a weekend stay for her and her husband. We do get along and enjoy their visit, except for one thing. When I entertain, I like to plan all the meals, snacks, etc., and prepare them in advance so I don’t spend a lot of time cooking while they are here.
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2 weeks ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My son is graduating with honors from a very selective university. My husband wants to invite family from both sides to attend, which would require everyone to travel out of state to a very expensive city. Initially, we were going to host a nice party after the ceremony. Now it’s completely off, due to volatility in my husband’s job. He still wants to invite everyone, but let them know we can’t house them or provide any celebration outside of the graduation ceremony.
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3 weeks ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When serving a steak, the server will often say something along the lines of, “Please cut into the center to make sure it’s cooked the way you want it.” At a business dinner of around 20 people, I was rather rudely corrected for doing so by someone who thought I was about to commence eating before everyone’s entree had been served. Should I have waited until everyone was served to check my steak, even though I wasn’t eating yet?
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4 weeks ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was taught by my mother and grandmother, who practiced what they preached, that condolence letters are to be acknowledged. Their practice was to answer every condolence letter with a return letter. It could be long or short, but at the very least it should express gratitude for the sender’s thoughtfulness.
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1 month ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When hosting a cocktail hour, how does the hostess gracefully navigate the quantity of food served? For example, if the cheese platter is reduced to a few bites, should the hostess be constantly monitoring and replenishing it, even if the planned “hour” has passed? I certainly don’t want to appear stingy with guests. But bringing out more food seems to encourage lingering and drifting into dinner time and beyond.
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1 month ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: We visited a friend and her new partner for a weekend visit. Her partner drove us to an outing about 20 miles away and went 95 mph on the highway. Despite fearing for our lives, we said nothing. On the way back, however, I politely asked the partner if he could please keep his speed under 80 mph. He immediately turned indignant, got out of the car and told me I should drive and that he would sit in the back with my wife.
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1 month ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have been taking time off work to help care for my father, who has incurable cancer. To clients I don’t know well, I’ve said, “I’ll be out of town to help my dad, who is sick.”They almost invariably reply, “I hope he feels better soon.” I know they mean well, and I usually manage to take it that way. But that doesn’t stop it from feeling like a gut punch, because I know he is only going to feel worse over the few months he has left.
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1 month ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: What exactly are the rules for saving seats at an informal event where seats are not assigned? When I was invited to my nephew’s martial arts presentation, I arrived half an hour early to save seats for my family of five (three of us were present) because the others were coming from work and couldn’t arrive early. A woman came and sat in one of the saved seats, even though my jacket was on the seat, and I politely told her that it was reserved.
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2 months ago | 
adn.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: If my neighbor has a yard sale, should I feel obligated to purchase something, even if I have no use for it? Conversely, if I have a yard sale and a neighbor wants to purchase something, should I tell them to just take it, no charge? GENTLE READER: Unless your residential area has an unusual outside draw, most of your customers are going to be neighbors. If you give things away to them, it will be a Yard Donation, not a Sale.
