Judith Martin

Telephone usage is evolving, creating the hope—or illusion—that we will arrive at some reasonable understanding. One encouraging sign is that many people consider it wrong simply to telephone, without first texting to set a convenient time to talk.

Does the “celebration of life” require etiquette adjustments from the funeral, which it is increasingly replacing? There is a danger in the very premise a celebration of life requires—the attempt to banish sadness. So please do not mandate cheerfulness

It is the duty of guests to socialize with the hosts and other guests. The rule is to separate couples so that they can do so. They should not be asked, because no one wants to declare a preference for being apart. If there is a compelling reason, the guest should declare it.

Doctors tell Miss Manners that they should be so addressed because earned the right to that title, and that they use patients’ first names to be friendly and put them at ease. But patients are also entitled to honorifics, just by virtue of being adult human beings.

One rudeness does not justify another.

It is true that gentlemen—but not ladies—were supposed to remove their gloves when shaking hands—but Miss Manners is hereby suspending that rule.

It is churlish to deprecate politeness. There is little enough of it going around.

When it comes to tipping, which is supposed to be a compliment, it is almost impossible not to insult someone somehow.

Why, indeed, does everyone, celebrated or just hoping to be celebrated, feel the need to post everything about their lives? We claim to care about our privacy.

With all of the schemes, demands, and shenanigans associated with modern present giving, the act has all but lost its charm.

In contrast to rolling stones, repeated sources of friction in relationships tend to gather to themselves all sorts of stray detritus.

Miss Manners does not countenance the extreme rudeness of ignoring a wedding present for up to a year (which is anyway interpreted as forever). And she has stated this a thousand times. Thanks should be expressed immediately upon receiving a present.

Rude to brag? Isn’t it the national sport?

“Proper audience behavior” is under hot debate these days. The rules of silence that Miss Manners prefers date only from the early 20th century. Before that, audiences treated even plays and operas as if they were at home streaming.

While Miss Manners generally agrees that guests’ comfort takes precedence over rugs and furniture, she has her limits and they usually apply to children. Just because they want to jump on the furniture and throw things in the house, does not mean it should be allowed.

It is in the interest of restaurants to have dissatisfied customers speak up, so that errors are corrected and they go home happy. In other business transactions, people know that they are entitled to get what they asked to buy, and not swallow others’ mistakes, so to speak.

Right or wrong is not the point; the point is that it is embarrassing to be corrected in front of other people.