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1 day ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I worked with someone who was uber passive-aggressive and made my life at work difficult. Fortunately, she retired at the end of the semester. There was a retirement gathering for her with cake and coffee, given by her colleagues. I vowed long ago as division chair to never attend a gathering for this individual, so I skipped it. I was confronted and scolded regarding my absence. I didn’t want to lie, so I said there were personal issues that precluded me from attending.
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3 days ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Between my husband and me, who have each been married previously to other people, we have four children, 11 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren. We have been married to each other for almost 25 years. Six of the grandchildren and all of the great-grandchildren have been born during our marriage. I am especially close to some of the grandchildren from his side of the family.
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6 days ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I would be most grateful if you could provide guidance on how to graciously handle two common problems with email. 1. The response, “I never check that account.”What do we do when our correspondence goes into a black hole? A number of people have claimed that the message I sent went to an account that they never check. But they don’t offer a newer or better address. 2. Social correspondents writing from their work accounts.
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1 week ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am part of a group of six college friends from 50 years ago. We stay in touch by texting often, and getting together in person every few years. We are spread out geographically, but one friend and I are just a few miles apart and have always seen each other more often. I was to stop by this friend’s house to pick something up, and I texted her my expected arrival time.
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1 week ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Would you consider it rude to bring an additional dish to a dinner, even if it wasn’t requested? This is for an Easter dinner, so it is a meal in which the dishes are meant to be special. When I asked what I could contribute, I was asked to bring a side.
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1 week ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My company has a return to office four days a week mandate this year. While it’s nice to have the in-person camaraderie, co-workers who are conspicuously ill are coming in and spreading their contagion. (My company provides a generous two weeks of “occasional absence,” which may be used for sick days, doctor appointments and such.) No one says anything. I am now sick (at home). These co-workers are not heroes for coming in to work with their germs, but selfish and inconsiderate.
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2 weeks ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am curious what the etiquette is at a gathering when music is playing in a friend’s home on the voice-controlled device. Is it OK for a guest to speak directly to the device to ask it to play a song? GENTLE READER: Many of us remain skeptical of manufacturers’ claims that if only we keep paying for upgrades, tomorrow’s devices will be smarter than the dimmest cat.
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2 weeks ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: From the files of “good manners run amok,” is it ever impolite to be friendly? I work in a bustling environment where my sole 30-minute break is in a shared break room, where I like to read or just eat quietly and enjoy the peacefulness.
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2 weeks ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Is it acceptable to place a small evening clutch on the table while dining out? Often, the restaurant chairs have open backs, so if I place the clutch behind me, it falls to the floor. (In the worst cases, it spills its contents, too.) If I place it in my lap under my napkin, if frequently slides to the floor, because my dress has a slippery fabric. If I try to place it under my leg, it cuts off circulation, even if I manage not to crush the contents.
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3 weeks ago | 
spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My teenage son had begun seeing a new neurologist, who is highly recommended and seems to be very skilled. We have had two appointments with this doctor. Both times, he used at least a half-dozen swear words in the 20-minute appointment. He’s young, very friendly, very informal and probably thinks it’s no big deal because my son is a teenager.
