Madison Dillard

New York

Associate Editor and Writer at Reductress

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Articles

Crossover Episode? This Woman’s Dream Was a Combination of All the Shows She’s Been Watching

Jul 31, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard |Womanspiration -

In a long-awaited event that is taking the entertainment industry by storm, 27-year-old Tonie Legarro has just woken up from her mind’s very own crossover episode: a dream in which the shows she’s been watching regularly all came together in her subconscious. Wow! Who knew she basically had three combined writers’ rooms in her brain this whole time? “I always loved watching crossover episodes on Disney Channel and Nickelodeon when I was growing up,” Tonie told reporters gathered at the scene.
Woman Takes Shoes Off at the Door Even Though She Eats in Bed

Jul 31, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

It's Self CareIntuitive EatingDouble Standard × WE'RE DESPERATE FOR YOUR APPROVAL.
How to Make New Lifelong Friends Now That’s It’s Wedding Season

Jul 26, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard |Living -

Wedding season is officially upon us, and if you haven’t attended a wedding yet this summer, you might feel like you’re running out of time to find a friend who’s getting married this year. If this sounds like you, then you’re in luck! Here are some foolproof ways to quickly find a new lifelong friend just in time to enjoy a free dinner, open bar, and delicious slice of cake:Utilize social media.
Woman Wishes Dance Music Would Drop When She Actually Has Money to Go to the Club

Jul 24, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

In a classic Catch-22, Brooklyn resident Janizca Lowell has noticed that the best dance music always comes out when prices are at an all-time high, meaning that she will never be able to experience the best pop music the way it was intended: by going to the club. “Just like the music that came out during the 2008 housing market crash, the hits just keep on coming,” Janizca told reporters gathered in her bedroom, where she was solemnly bumping the latest Kaytranada album.
Perspective Is Everything! This Woman Only Has One Tampon Left of the Workday

Jul 19, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard |Womanspiration -

In a story that highlights the power of positive thinking, 31-year-old Helen Markel has completely reframed her outlook on life with one simple trick: rethinking her workday in tampon-wearing increments. What an optimistic genius!“Before, when I was still stuck in a loss mindset, I always thought of my workday as eight square hours,” Helen told reporters gathered at the scene.
Woman Burnt Out After All of the TikToks She Just Watched

Jul 17, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

In a story that highlights the ongoing plight of being too online, 28-year-old Riley Thomas has burnt the candle at both ends by watching TikTok for a record-breaking four hours and 20 minutes straight. According to Riley, she was managing her work/life balance just fine until she opened the TikTok app on her phone. “My accounting job is pretty easy actually — I don’t work that hard at it,” Riley told reporters gathered around her while she was recovering in bed.
Woman Looking Forward to Going Home and Curling Up With Good Ingrown Hair

Jul 10, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

RelaxingIngrown HairPerfect Night! × WE'RE DESPERATE FOR YOUR APPROVAL.
Bootlicker? This Woman Showed Up to Work on Time

Jul 2, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard |Womanspiration -

In a disappointing story coming out of Austin, TX, 29-year-old Marie Lawson is demonstrating her complete and unyielding devotion to the ruling class by showing up to her workplace a full minute earlier than she needed to be. Okay, bootlicker!“Running late always stresses me out,” Marie told reporters gathered at her office.
Officials Announce That Editing a Video on Your Phone Now Included as Olympic Sport

Jun 30, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

Along with the new additions of sport climbing, skateboarding, and surfing, editing a short video that you’re planning to post on TikTok or Reels has now been officially added as a qualifying sport at the 2024 Paris Olympics. “We’ve been contemplating this since the 2020 games. This decision is long overdue,” International Olympic Committee member Caroline Dassani told reporters.
I LIVED IT: I Had to Wear Sunglasses Even Though My Eyes Are My Best Feature

Jun 26, 2024 | reductress.com | Madison Dillard

Everyone has to make sacrifices at some point. I learned this the hard way when it started getting hotter out and the sun became too constant and bright to ignore. That’s right — I had to wear sunglasses even though my eyes are, by far, my best feature. I guess life isn’t fair after all. For years, I’ve successfully dodged the issue of having to wear sunglasses outside.