Wendi Aarons

1 week ago | mcsweeneys.net | Wendi Aarons

Please take a few moments to let us know how you’d like your tax dollars spent by the Trump administration. 1. It’s important to me that my money supports…a) public televisionb) national parksc) irrigation for the Mar-a-Lago golf course2. In this era of climate crisis, the government must invest more in…a) green and renewable energyb) electric and solar-powered vehicles c) plastic straws3.

1 month ago | thebarbedwire.com | Omar Gallaga |Wendi Aarons

Let us tell you a tale, youngster, of an Austin ruled by crushed tallboys, pink hair at Barton Creek, and Butthole Surfers songs blasting from FM car radios — long before Lime scooters were invented. Once upon a time, migas tacos used to cost just $.99 and include a free Lone Star, delivered by a cowboy on horseback. That cowboy? Mayor Ethan Hawke. See that building that’s plastered in protein powder as part of a supplement company’s brand activation?

Nov 5, 2024 | mcsweeneys.net | Wendi Aarons

Cat-Hair-Covered Yoga Pants: Voted for Harris Toupee-Hair-Covered Suit Pants: Voted for Trump Bear-Hair-Covered Vintage L.L.Bean Board Shorts: Wrote in “RFK Jr. + The Worm” Pants Worn Only Every Four Years That Were Bought by Someone Else: Voted for Jill Stein Frayed Corduroys That Nobody Wants or Needs: Voted for Cornel West Fair-Trade, Ethically Sourced Cotton Trousers: Did not vote in protest Novelty Pajama Bottoms with Weed Motif: Forgot to vote Wasn’t Sure Which Pants to Wear: Did not...

Oct 31, 2024 | mcsweeneys.net | Ali Solomon |Wendi Aarons

ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE Young reader in your life? Subscribe to Illustoria magazine today. Recognized by The New York Times as a best gift for kids! Please help support our writers and keep our site ad-free by becoming a patron. ➤ Trending 🔥 I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About by Sam Woods Is It Perimenopause or the Fascist Death Knell of Late-Stage Capitalism?

Oct 22, 2024 | mcsweeneys.net | Wendi Aarons

Sometime in the future, three prisoners from the Keystone MAGA Work Camp carve President Trump’s likeness into Mount Rushmore. PROTEST VOTER: You know what I thought when I woke up this morning, facing yet another day of carving President Trump’s head into Mount Rushmore? I regret not voting for Harris in 2024. CONSPIRACY BELIEVER: Yeah, I kind of do too. But Jill Stein just made a lot of sense to me. How were we supposed to know we’d be sent to this work camp for not supporting Trump?