Destini Baylis Adams

Feb 14, 2024 | theoffingmag.com | Anna Sandy Elrod |Jean-Luc Bouchard |Destini Baylis Adams |Sahara Sidi

Dear young poets, you should knowI’ll sleep with the best ones. Pulitzer pussy, Guggenheim gooch,Hugo anything — I’m good withBooker bastards in bed. PEN isdependent on tradition & individualtalent, your remarkable abilityto live & die both on the pageand in the air — face down. God,they know devotion so well. Contain multitudes and mommy issues. They can abandon one thingfor the next muse. Those starsare like dead. Did you know that? Keep counting them, baby.

Nov 8, 2023 | theoffingmag.com | Rita Mookerjee |Dolan Morgan |Mike Itaya |Destini Baylis Adams

after Taylor ByasHey, girl. I was at your old house just now. They’re trying to do you dirty. Did you knowthey turned that place into a museum? They even made a replica of that old whitehousecoat and stuck it on a mannequin inyour bedroom near your desk like a headless maidwaiting for you to go downstairs so she can snoopthrough your shit. Speaking of which, the docent isuncomfortable talking about your letters.

Oct 25, 2023 | theoffingmag.com | Dolan Morgan |Mike Itaya |Destini Baylis Adams |Rowdy Geirsson

Please choose from the following menu options. Listen carefully, as our selections may have changed. If you know your party’s extension, you may dial it at any time. If you are calling about an existing reservation, or if you would like to make a new reservation, press nothing, your reservation is confirmed, you are already signed up, it’s going to happen, and there’s nothing you can do about it. The reservation is made.

Oct 11, 2023 | theoffingmag.com | Destini Baylis Adams |Rowdy Geirsson |Khadjiah Johnson |Mike Itaya

Wednesday. 8:00 AM. Sticker of a Winking Dolphin:Retired detective Barry Borscht doesn’t know how to bullet journal. But he is six days into retirement and enjoys putting funny stickers on the pages. Borscht has time to kill. The Deputy Chief put him out to pasture after the botched murder inquiry into Rando McTavisham. Now Borscht is stuck in the “Rubber Room” (his living room) where ex-coppers go to die. Wednesday. 6:17 PM.

Sep 27, 2023 | theoffingmag.com | Rowdy Geirsson |Khadjiah Johnson |Victoria Hulbert |Destini Baylis Adams

First, throw your self-esteem out the window. Don’t half ass this step. It is crucial. Forget all the self-help books and mantras being talked about on the internet. All the healthy things your former therapist suggests: journaling, writing him a ‘letter’ (that is for old people!), or trying to get closure. Nope. Do. Not. Do. It. No matter what you do, he will be on your mind all the time. You’ll remember the way his eyes changed from brown to green.