Judith Martin

4 days ago | spokesman.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I remember growing up, when we had visitors who were new to our house, my mother would give them the “grand tour.” I now do that with all of my first-time visitors. I have, however, noticed that nobody else does this when I am a first-time visitor – making my initial query about the bathroom a little awkward. Did people stop showing their houses? Should I just begin and end the tour with “Here’s the bathroom”?

1 week ago | mercurynews.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’m an adult with physical and emotional disabilities, and I live with my caregiver. I have an older friend who is a very sweet person with good intentions, but I feel like she doesn’t really understand my needs. Among other things, I have a catheter and use a wheelchair. She often says she wants to “take me out on the town” to “get crazy.” So far, she’s never followed through with any of these invitations, but every time she brings it up, I feel very uncomfortable.

1 week ago | mercurynews.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My brother and his wife were visiting me for a week. During that week, I was invited to a barbecue at the home of some old friends. I explained that my brother and sister-in-law were visiting and asked if it would be OK for them to attend. The hostess said “of course.” I made extra portions of food and brought them along.

2 weeks ago | mercurynews.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My boss let me know that my co-workers have often “told on me,” reporting when I arrive back to work three minutes late from lunch or leave a few minutes early. I don’t know how to continue to work with these people and see them daily, now that I know that none of them are my friends — and that, in fact, they have it out for me and are reporting every little thing I do. GENTLE READER: Naive Miss Manners never fell for the line that her co-workers should also be her best friends.

2 weeks ago | mercurynews.com | Judith Martin |Nicholas Martin |Jacobina Martin

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Should a daughter spend Father’s Day with her husband or her father? I haven’t seen my daughter on Father’s Day since she got married 18 years ago. Her husband demands to spend Father’s Day at their beach house 300 miles away, and later they will want to host me there for a visit. I think this is extremely selfish of him and a slap in the face to me. She has no backbone when it comes to him and his family; she “married up,” or so she thinks.